Its official: People love their phones

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The other day, I kept my cell phone on charge like I normally do in the morning and forgot to unplug it and put it in my bag in that mad rush to get out of the house for office. 

I didn’t realize that I had left my phone back at home until I wanted to make an important call and was searching high and low for it in the office. Then at the back of my mind I constantly thought about it as if it was something I couldn't live without (it seems like that though). I felt so hollow. 

It always amazes me how this little device has completely taken over our life. You’re in a café to catch up with an old friend over coffee but instead of talking both of you are hunched over the phone. 
You have a family dinner and your phone is in your hands. Either you’re texting, checking emails or looking up for updates or notifications. It’s like your whole life depends on this device. 

You’re with a person and in the meantime you’re catching up with someone else at some other place. This human mind. I tell you. It’s a monkey mind, sprawled all over the place. 

I was with a friend last night whom we hadn’t seen each other for quite some time. There was so much to talk about us. In between conversations, she was constantly fiddling with her phone, God knows what she was doing. I don’t blame her. I rather felt amused and remarked at her “wow, you’re quite active on social network.” 

I’m out for a dinner with friends. The food is served and you know what I do, after some quick setting of the table, I take out the device and take picture, not once but multiple times from different angles. 

With a quick smile, I say ‘It’s for the instagram.”

In the mean time the food turns cold. It’s like that spiritual aunt saying the grace for the food where she starts praying for the violence in Gaza and the food turning cold. 

Sometimes, I feel that we need to detox from this device called cell phone. 
Or cell phone etiquettes. I seriously need it.

It could be as simple as like switching off phones during meal time or no cell phones after you get into bed. So that you would be able to engage in meaningful eating and conversation. You would be able to appreciate your friend and compliment her/him in real life instead of liking their pictures and commenting on facebook, instagram and twitter. Smile at the stranger instead of hunching over the phone and sometimes tripping over.   
 

Having said these, there’s so much good things about this device which I chose to ignore here and kept it for another time.

Is your life completely taken over by your cell phone? If yes, I’d like to hear how.

Happy Thursday! 

Simple Things

It’s the simplest things in life that brings great happiness. Simple things like: 

++ the summer here in the capital, all warm and fresh. Summer is all about discarding the thick and uncomfortable wear and relaxing just in a tee and shorts. It’s about wearing that neon pink flip flops and taking a stroll towards the evening with the warm and gentle breeze on your face. 

++ vegetable shopping in the weekend farmer’s market and bargaining for that slice of pumpkin. I like to go for that pumpkin which is not too sweet when cooked and becomes more like potatoes. It’s all about asking the farmer where the pumpkin is from. That way you can make little conversation with them and promise them that you’ll again visit them next weekend. Call me a miser. 

++ conditioning your hair with a pack of henna and a shower cap. It’s more natural with less chemicals and super good conditioner for the hair. Yes, I’m old school and I prefer henna over other hair color even though it’s tedious. 

++ standing by the window and watching the raindrops in the late afternoon. Ah….bliss! 

++ watching The Fault in Our Stars movie in bed and giggling all the time especially when you know the dialogues from the book and you say it loud and feel like a teenager. 

++ sipping tea from your favorite teacup and that old familiarity engulfs you because you’ve shared that afternoon tea with someone you loved once. 

Am I being a hopeless romantic? I think I’m not. 

So relax, let go of the feelings that gnaw you and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. Because it’s the simple things in life that are the most extraordinary. 

It has been a blissful Saturday where I did all of these. I hope your weekend is being great like mine. 

And yes let’s gear up for the world cup final between Germany and Argentina. I was rooting for The Netherlands all those time when my heart got crushed. So obviously I’m up for the Germans now. 

Have a lovely weekend.

Being a tourist in your own city // the weekend market

My daily commute to work takes me through the Centenary Farmer’s Market aka the weekend market. The market is open from Thursday till Sunday night. Vendors from throughout the region start arriving from Thursday and Friday morning. So if you want to get fresh produce you should head to the market on a Thursday evening. 
Even for two, I do the vegetable shopping from here. 

In my sixth year of residency in Thimphu, I have never bothered to look beyond the market towards the other side of the Wang chhu. 

Across the cantilever footbridge, known as the Kundeyling Baazam, on the west bank of Wang chhu is the collection of stalls and handicraft market. I was told it was part of the weekend market when I once visited it on a weekday. I was mildly disappointed to see no stalls in sight. 

The amusing fact in Bhutan is that we do not have proper etiquette on notice and direction. The shops may open and shut down anytime. 

For this matter, there’s no information on the name and opening hours of this market. So we call this market as the trinket market for our convenience though it houses clothing stalls at the right. 

It was a pleasant surprise to find a host of handicraft products like wooden bowls, mala beads, printing blocks, amulets, yak tails, prayer wheels and trinkets. There are some gems if you look further and up close. 

What fascinated me most was the trinkets; all looking tribal, vintage and priceless. I lamented for not visiting this market sooner when I needed the accessories. How come it skipped my attention when it was right under my nose?

And the interesting thing is we can bargain too. The prices are reasonable as well. Ahhhh-mazing!

I excitedly told my brother about the market and he was like: 

“Oh yeah, I’ve been there.” Completely taken aback, with eyes rolling I asked him, “Really? When? And why?” 

Him: “I was there to buy khuru.” 
So khurus are sold there too. I’m sure many of you especially men must have been there to buy khurus or even clothing. And for those of you like me, you can still go to buy accessories and other handicraft products. 

P.S: This market is one of the top tourist destinations in Thimphu in case you’re wondering. 

Have you been to this market? 

Wishing you all a lovely weekend.

Leaving the soul ajar

 2014 is flying past the window. 

It’s already June which means we are halfway through the year. Another 6 months lie ahead for the goals and wishes to be completed. Hmnn…I think it’s that time of the year to revisit your goals. Are you doing it? 

My goal this year is to read and read more. I’m halfway through this challenge.

Other than that, work is going great. I’m pulling through. 

The days unroll like slow summer storms, warm, damp and heavy. Life has taken that slow mode where everything seems as if it has been left on its own to survive.

Being Type A personality means I like to keep things rigidly planned and organized. I like to have a sense of direction in life. And it irks me that I’m letting things to take control now. But I have also realized that sometimes things should be left as it is. 

My dreams and aspirations in life; I have left it on its own for now. And I’m happy with it. What is yours is yours and I’m rejoicing in the ways things are. 

Of late, I’m reminded that ‘Life is one time’ and I do not want to waste it on wrath, avarice, sloth, pride, lust, envy and gluttony. More aptly the seven deadly sins. 

I don’t want to hurt anyone. Even if somebody tries to hurt me, I want to forgive them easily. Because once done then it’s done. There’s a no re-set button to life. 

Does that mean that I’m gaining spirituality? 

Because these are the times, I feel alive, relevant and happy. 

This means that I’m a work in progress. That after a while I will learn the subtle difference between that messy pause of dream and wake. 

The irrevocable balance of life and loss. That I would be able to take off that backpack of mistakes, failures, dead-end roads and regrets off my shoulder. 

That I would be able to leave my soul ajar and let the new story unfold and if possible sing an old bollyhood song. 

Just to brighten up the mood after this serious talk, I'd like to leave you with these 60 rare photos that will destroy everything you knew about the past.

Random Ramblings

It was just yesterday when I went down south to my village and wrote about it in this post. That was the beginning of a new month. 

And today, it’s already the end of May. Gosh! How did May flash by this fast?

Whoooossh! It came. And went the same way. 

It’s true that time cannot be recovered after it’s gone.

For that matter, I cannot recover this very moment. This moment where I sat down to write this post plopping into my mouth the juicy plums I bought from the Paro-Thimphu highway yesterday. 

Sometimes I want to freeze those memories. Memories that are worth remembering. Because remembering it brings fondness to the heart and a smile to the face. And I freeze that in the form of pictures and blog posts. That way I can always remember the immortality of those memories.

What was I doing last year at this time of the year? The only highlight of May '13 is the time I was anticipating about the Denmark trip. Other than that nothing fascinating was up on the month of May. 

May '14. I’m where I was. The same old me. Except a year older, wiser and matured. Did time stop for me? Haha I wish so. 

The only change in me is my hairstyle. In 11 years time of growing out my hair, this angled bob hairstyle is the shortest I’ve had. 

Other than that I haven’t changed a bit. 

I’m surprised. Blown out.   

And of course proud of myself. 

Because people change. 

Things change. 

It’s even more surprising when the people you have always taken for granted change overnight. Even if people and things change and they leave, life does not stop for anybody. 

So here I plod on into the month of June. 

How was your May month?

Books I've read recently

April has been a quiet, peaceful and a lonely month for me. For reasons unknown, the blossom of spring failed to set my heart aglow as it used to when spring was in the air. 

May started. My heart did not progress well in the happiness index. I continued to grow lonely. I stopped going out of the house except to work and to the grocery store. 

I took a weekend off to go to the village for this ailing heart to heal. It did help for a while. I returned to Thimphu; to my work and to my life hoping for a fresh start. Yet I was there where I left. 

During these months, I escaped to the world of fantasy, sunk into it, away from the harsh realities of life. Between the pages of the books, I found a lovely place to stay. There hasn’t been a night I went to bed before midnight no matter how tired and exhausted I am.So that’s when I got lost in these books:

And the Mountains Echoed: Khaled Hosseini, the author of The Kite Runner and A Thousand Splendid Suns comes up with another riveting tale about love in his new book And the Mountains Echoed. 

It’s about how we take care of one another and how the choices we make resonate through generations. The tale in this book revolves around not just parents and children but brothers and sisters, cousins and caretakers. 

Hosseini explores the many ways in which families nurture, wound, betray, honor and sacrifice for one another; and how often we are surprised by the actions of those closest to us, at the times that matter most. 

From Kabul to Paris to San Francisco to the Greek island of Tinos, the journey in the book takes us gradually outward, becoming more emotionally complex and powerful with each turning page. A great story teller he is. 

The catcher in the Rye: Published in 1951, J.D Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye remains one of the best books about adolescence ever written. Holden Caulfield, a seventeen year old prep school adolescent relates his lonely, life-changing twenty-four hour stay in New York City as he experiences the phoniness of the adult world while attempting to deal with the death of his younger brother, an overwhelming compulsion to lie and troubling sexual experiences. 

Salinger, whose characters are among the best and most developed in all of literature has captured the eternal angst of growing into adulthood in the person of Holden Caulfield. Anyone who has reached the age of sixteen will be able to identify with this unique and yet universal character, for Holden contains bits and pieces of all of us. 

It is for this very reason that The Catcher in the Rye has become one of the most beloved and memorable works in literature world. I just wish I had come across this book when I was seventeen and yeah I had a hearty laugh over this book. 

The Husband’s Secret: There was much hype about the book and I wanted to know what the hype was. Set in Australia, Sydney, The Husband’s Secret tells the stories of three families: the Crowleys, the Fitzpatricks, and the O’Learys. 

It’s about a letter from the husband which is supposed to be opened only on his death. Just like Cecelia, I would have opened the letter out of curiosity. Curiosity kills the cat. And the real plot unravels leaving the readers at grip. 

The Hypnotist’s Love story: A wonderful friend sent me this book. Patrick must be the best boyfriend, Ellen O’Farrell, the hypnotherapist has ever had. Patrick is attractive, single, enthusiastic, and active and is a Surveyor. But along with this package of his, there comes another complete package; his former girlfriend turned stalker, his eternally young and beautiful dead wife. How is an ordinary hypnotherapist to cope with this sort of competition? 

I loved the fact that Patrick is a Surveyor since I’ve to deal with Surveyors always at work. It helped me to understand him more. It’s an exquisitely spinning and intense unfolding of the viewpoints told from both the stalker and the hypnotherapist. A must read best-seller. 

I am Malala: The story took the world by its grip when the girl who stood for education was shot by the Taliban. Malala tells of that life shattering moment in a fearless riveting memoir I am Malala, co-written with journalist Christina Lamb. 

Educate a man, you educate an individual. Educate a woman and you educate the whole family. In this part of the world, education is taken for granted. I just wish our teenagers value the rights to education and pursue its sweetness and its fruit. This is one book which should be read by every teenager.

Especially towards the end of the story when Malala was reuniting with her family in the hospital, my thoughts choked. I simply couldn’t put down the book. I closed it, went out in the balcony, took a breathe of fresh air and returned to continue. It was a little after midnight that I finally read the last page and fell asleep. I had a dream that night, a dream which was not a pleasant one. 

Norwegian Wood: Last night I finished the Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami.I’m at loss for words to describe Murakami’s writings. And I know I will never find the perfect syllable to describe it. This man amazes me in his writings. I’m in love with his words. 

Norwegian Wood is a nostalgic story of love, loss and burgeoning sexuality. For that nostalgic person in me, this book brought me leaps of joys and faith. At the same time, it left me emotionally crippled. Sometimes I had to put the book down, lie on the bed with my hands supporting my head and get lost in the story. I smiled to myself sometimes and banged my head other times when the plot was going haywire. He is a writer after my own heart. 

Apart from these, I read The Bell Jar and Looking for Alaska. Woah! that’s quite a lot of books. Currently, I’m reading The Happiness Project. 

Have you read any of these books? How was it? Any book you’d like to recommend me? I’d love that. A good book recommendation is what I need now.

Reconnecting with my village

That's indeed the long hair of my sister-in-law :)

I like to plan things.I find great pleasure in it. But it seems that certain thing happens best when unplanned. Like this trip to my maternal village, Sipsoo. 

 

After a stressful day at work, I was decluttering my closet at home wondering about the long weekends ahead when the thought strike me. 

The thought of traveling to Sipsoo. I do not have my grandparents though whom I would love to pay a visit now and then. 

Sometimes I wish they are still here. To see how their family had expanded over the decades, the grandchildren they have now. 

It has been more than two decades since they left. I made sure that I will visit their graves this time. 

 

Oh yeah, I had two grandmas married to my grandpa. They were sisters, interestingly. My uncles and aunts say that he was an authoritarian man in his yore days. 

 

So the next day, I hopped on the 7 am bus to Sipsoo and before long the hot and sticky weather at the border town of Jaigaon made me realize that indeed I was on my way. I had to pinch myself because I felt like I was in a spell between reality and dream. 

 

The never ending straight highway lay like a long stretch of rope with tea garden estates on both sides. It was spectacularly beautiful!I knew why our movie industry chose that location for filming the song scenes. 

I slide the long window panes of the bus, took out my head and hands outside. The air felt warm on my face. I loved it! 

 

Just as the sun was retiring behind the picturesque mountains in marmalade colors, the bus reached to the place I thought about the previous night. How one thought clicks and willpower clacks. My heart fluttered. 

 

The quaint sleepy town of Gola Bazaar near a small brook just before we reach my village seemed quite familiar. The brook is infamous for flash floods in peak summer and abundantly rich in fish. This is a place where my mother grew up and went to school in a little grey frock and a navy blue blazer. Those days in the south, they need not wear gho and kira to school, they say. 

 

Soon after I cross the little brook, lush green maize fields greeted me. I wanted to play hide and seek in the field, lie on the bundle of piled hay and watch the skies in the starry night in the balmy evening. One day I shall do it, I thought to myself because I felt that reconnection instantly. Oh did I tell you that; 

 

One day when I retire, I shall build a small farmhouse in this village and live here. 

My grandchildren would come and visit me and sometimes live with me. 

 

We shall go fishing in the brook if my health favors or walk towards the bazaar for a lil’ grocery shopping. 

I shall write a book then ‘cause in order to write about life you must live it. I would have lived aptly then.

Dare to dream. It need not have to happen.That's why we call it dreams.

Do you also have plans and dreams for your old age? Please share,I'd love to hear.